“Years ago, I was habitually late. “I can’t help it!” I declared to an expert in time management (I’d turned my effort to reform into a magazine article, as writers do, which gave me the excuse to seek professional help). “Have you ever missed a plane?” she asked. I had not. “Then you can help it. You just care more about yourself than about the needs of others.” I may be naturally reserved, and more comfortable alone than I will ever be in a crowd, but I am not at the mercy of my nature. There are many excuses for failing to conduct ourselves with courtesy, for avoiding gatherings and conversations we don’t think we will enjoy, or for just putting on our pajamas and staying home. Too many of them boil down to just that one thing: We care more about ourselves than about the needs of others. That’s not about introversion. It’s just an ordinary version of selfishness.” KJ Dell’Antonia


Today take time to read the full article, and reflect on the quality of interpersonal attention you offer others. Do you use your preferences as an excuse to be be rude? Remember that good quality relationships support a quiet mind.


Tweet your response to @livedtime and be sure to include the hashtag #tds979

This Daily Stillness has been recycled from previously published ones:

#tds456 Are you introverted or just rude? (Sep 28, 2016)
#tds617 Are you introverted or just rude? (Mar 8, 2017)

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2 Responses to “#tds979 Are you introverted or just rude?”

  1. hasnan

    As it is true that introverted people are reserved and like to be alone, shyness is no characteristic of introversion. Introversion is a characteristic of its own. I”ve done quite my part of research on introversion as I”m introverted myself. The difference between introversion and extroversion is that an extroverted person gets energized by social interactions while an introverted person”s energy gets drained when having social interactions and needs to recharge” after it. This indeed means that introverts like to be alone and are often quiet but this is not necessarily shyness, it is just that introverts don”t feel the need to talk when they don”t have to. I give it to you that introversion and shyness go hand in hand but this doesn”t mean introverts are shy or shy people are introverts. May we meet again

    • Mariana

      Thank you for visiting and your account of personal learning about introversion. The article we linked to here, was less about the actual label and more about how, at times, we use our personal preferences as an excuse to not do something for somebody else, even when that ‘something’ was not a preference for us.


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